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Help for Child Abuse, Neglect by Abusive Father

Practical steps to get help if facing child abuse, neglect from alcoholic father: call 112, child helpline, report to guardianship, document evidence, find shelters, and plan safety for well-being in Russia.

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How can I get help and protect myself if my father is neglectful and abusive? He only cares about my grades, spends half his salary on alcohol, frequently yells at me or hits me over minor things, and refuses to believe teachers who say I need a different learning method even though they acknowledge I study well. What practical steps can I take to find support, address the abuse, and improve my safety and well-being?

If your father is neglectful and abusive, you can get immediate protection by contacting emergency services (112), the national child helpline, and local guardianship or social services to report child abuse, child neglect and parental alcoholism; they can investigate, provide shelter, and arrange medical and legal support. Start documenting injuries and incidents, involve teachers or another trusted adult so they file formal reports, and reach out to crisis centers or NGOs for confidential advice, temporary housing and psychological help. The steps below give practical scripts, phone numbers, evidence tips, safety planning and mental-health resources to help you find support and improve your safety and well‑being.


Contents


Immediate safety — what to do right now

Are you in immediate danger? If yes, leave the room and call emergency services right away — in Russia that’s 112 — and ask for the police or ambulance. If you can’t safely speak, try to call and keep the line open so the operator can trace the call, or use a trusted neighbour, friend or teacher to call for you. For immediate emotional support and advice from specialists, call the national child helpline (8‑800‑2000‑122) listed in national directories and hotlines https://worldhelplines.org/russia.html and check regional helpline rollout information https://bearr.org/regional-news/every-region-in-russia-to-have-a-helpline-for-parents-and-children/.

If there’s a wound or you’ve been hit, go to a medical facility immediately and ask for a written medical certificate documenting injuries; this record is crucial evidence. Don’t try to reason with someone who’s drunk — get yourself to safety first. If leaving home immediately isn’t possible, move to a room with a locked door or to a place where other adults or neighbours can see you (avoid kitchens or rooms with objects that could be used as weapons).


How to report child abuse and child neglect (who to call and what to say)

Who to contact (quick list)

What to say when you report (simple script)

  • To emergency services: “My name is X (or say you’re a child). I’m at [address]. My father [name/description] is hitting me and drinks a lot; I’m in danger now. Please send police/ambulance.”
  • To a helpline or guardianship: “I’m a child and my father often yells at me, hits me for small things, spends most of his salary on alcohol, and is neglecting my needs. Teachers say I learn well but need a different learning method and he refuses to listen. I want help and protection.”
  • To school staff asking them to report: “Please write a statement describing behaviour you’ve seen (injuries, fear, learning recommendations) and forward it to guardianship/social services.”

If you want anonymity at first, helplines and some NGOs can take anonymous reports and advise on next steps; but formal legal action (removal, criminal case) normally requires an identified complaint and evidence, which school or medical staff can provide. For advice on how to report effectively, see NGO guidance on preparing information before you call https://iswc.ru/helpme/.


Documenting abuse: evidence that helps

What to collect

  • Photographs of injuries, bruises or unsafe living conditions (date-stamp if possible).
  • Medical records and the written medical certificate from any treatment or exams. That documentation is especially important when reporting physical abuse. See media and official guidance recommending a medical exam to document injuries https://www.rbc.ru/life/news/688077099a7947f1331cf78f.
  • Written statements from teachers, school psychologist, classmates or neighbours who’ve witnessed incidents or seen neglect. Schools are often required to report suspected abuse; ask them to document observations. Guidance on who must report is summarized by regional authorities https://www.gov.spb.ru/gov/terr/reg_kirovsk/news/161103/.
  • A dated diary noting times, dates, what happened, who was present and whether alcohol was involved.
  • Screenshots or printed messages, if there are threats or abusive text messages.

How to keep it safe

  • Email copies to a trusted adult or to yourself in a cloud folder (so the father can’t delete them) and print a copy to keep with a friend or relative. Don’t leave all copies at home. NGOs and helplines can advise secure ways to preserve evidence: see local support mapping https://nasiliu.net/karta-pomoshhi/.
  • If you get medical help, ask staff for copies of medical certificates and records; these are official evidence for police and guardianship.

Working with your school and teachers

Teachers and school staff are essential allies — they can observe, document and initiate official reports. If teachers already say you study well but recommend a different learning method, ask them for a written statement or meeting notes; that shows the father’s refusal is harming your education and well‑being. NGOs that support children encourage getting school documentation because it strengthens a guardianship or police case https://verimtebe.ru/parents/who_to_contact/.

Ask the school:

  • For a written evaluation from your teacher/school psychologist describing academic performance and recommended teaching method.
  • To file a report to guardianship/child protection on your behalf if they suspect neglect or abuse.
  • For practical help: a safe place during school hours, a staff member you can go to when you feel unsafe.

If school staff are reluctant, show them the sample scripts above and explain that guardianship and social services are designed to protect children and support families.


Parental alcoholism: safety-first approach and options

When a parent drinks heavily and uses money for alcohol instead of family needs, that pattern can be evidence of neglect; regional health and social sites list alcoholism as a common cause of neglect and provide referral options https://www.medkirov.ru/site/LSPFC8371. Don’t try to force change while your father is intoxicated — that can make violence worse. Instead:

  • Prioritize safety: avoid confronting him when he’s drunk; leave or go to a safe adult.
  • Talk during sober moments, if safe, and suggest professional help through narcology or rehab services; several centers and medical articles describe how families start treatment and interventions (examples: https://medcentr-kristall.ru/o-nas/stati/otets-piet.html, https://narcosoyuz.ru/blog-alco/esli-otec-alkogolik/).
  • Use documented evidence of how alcohol causes neglect (missed payments, lack of food/attention, violence) when reporting to guardianship or police — it strengthens the case for intervention.

If relatives are willing and safe, arranging temporary placement with them can be a fast protective option while authorities evaluate the family.


Crisis centers and shelters for women and children offer immediate safety, legal help and counselling; regional directories and maps list these services and contact points https://nasiliu.net/karta-pomoshhi/ and regional social protection pages list available shelters and rehab services (example: Moscow dept. of social protection https://dszn.ru/press-center/news/6215). What guardianship and police can do:

If you need shelter or confidential guidance right now, call a helpline or search local crisis centers by region using the maps above; NGOs can help with transport, temporary placement and legal referrals.


Mental health and recovery — short- and long-term

Abuse and neglect affect your emotional and cognitive health. Short-term steps: find a trusted adult, call helplines, and see a pediatrician or psychologist who can document signs of trauma. Long-term recovery: therapy (individual and family where appropriate), school counselling, peer support groups and ongoing safety planning. The World Health Organization has an overview of child maltreatment and recommends timely psychosocial support and referral to mental-health services https://www.who.int/ru/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/child-maltreatment.

If you’re carrying shame or guilt — you didn’t cause the abuse. Talking to a psychologist, joining a support group for children of alcohol-dependent parents, or contacting organizations that work with abused children can help you rebuild confidence and plan for a safer future.


Practical safety plan and everyday tips

Small, practical steps reduce immediate risk and make reporting easier later.

  • Prepare a small “go-bag”: ID (if you have it), a copy of medical records, a list of phone numbers, some cash, charger, spare clothes. Keep it with a trusted neighbour or friend.
  • Choose safe exits from home and a few safe places to go (school office, neighbour, relative).
  • Use a code word with a friend or teacher to signal you need help.
  • Digital safety: back up photos and documents to a cloud account or email them to a trusted adult (don’t keep only local copies that could be checked). Change passwords if you think he monitors your device.
  • If the situation escalates: leave immediately and call 112. If you’re injured, get medical attention and ask for documentation.

A simple emergency card you keep in your pocket with key numbers (112, 8‑800‑2000‑122, a trusted adult) can help in a crisis.


What to expect after you report (process overview)

After a report, authorities usually assess risk: social services/guardianship may visit, police may interview family members and open investigations, and medical and educational professionals may be asked to provide statements. Outcomes vary — from family support and mandatory counselling to temporary removal of the child and criminal charges in severe cases. Government and prosecutor offices outline these steps and local procedures (examples: https://duma.gov.ru/news/45969/). Investigations can take time. Keep following up through your school, your social worker or the NGO that helped you — persistence matters.


Sources


Conclusion

You don’t have to handle parental abuse, neglect or parental alcoholism alone: emergency services (112), the national child helpline and guardianship/social services exist to protect you from child abuse and child neglect and to arrange shelter, medical documentation and legal steps. Start with immediate safety (leave and call if needed), document injuries and learning‑related statements from teachers, and involve school staff, helplines and NGOs to get shelter, counseling and legal support — keep copies of evidence offsite and follow up until authorities act. If you want, tell me what city/region you’re in and I can point to local hotlines and nearby crisis centers from the resources above.

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Help for Child Abuse, Neglect by Abusive Father